I vividly recall looking in the mirror and feeling so sad and broken that I didn’t even recognize the face looking back at me. Feeling like I was the only one in the world who felt this devastating loss. I didn't know how I would survive.
Nothing can prepare you for hearing the words “I’m so sorry mama, but your son is very sick and he is not coming home”. Despite brave medical interventions and teams of incredible professionals fighting for our son, his illness took a turn for the worse. At only two weeks old, Marshall passed away in our arms and changed our lives forever.
I remember returning to work or out in public to have an acquaintance or colleague make eye contact then turn away because they didn’t know what to say. Or when simple steps like having a shower or driving from one place to the next would open the flood gates of grief in those quiet moments left alone with my thoughts.
Carry You With Me is a labor of love, born of my desire to advocate for bereaved parents wishing to transform their pain. From speaking at medical events to inspire new standards of care to volunteering with bereavement organizations across North America and interviewing experts I believe the possibilities are endless. It is my wish to create a safe space for discussions and connection around grief by sharing my journey out loud.
If you’re reading this, you or someone you love are living through this loss.
I am here.
We are here.
To remind all of us that we are not alone.
Losing a baby can be an incredibly isolating experience. The Carry You With Me Community has been a beacon of light for me in a very dark storm. I feel great comfort in knowing that others have walked a similar journey and that I’m not alone. Being able to talk with those who completely understand is truly a gift. ~ Emily Duncanson
Alanna provides a workshop that honours your place in grief as well as makes you feel comfortable to go more in depth. She shares her heart and her son in a way that encourages others to do so as well.
~ Community member and workshop participant
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